Driving Theory Test

In the immortal words of Dr. Peter Venkman, “I came, I saw, I kicked its ass!”

Yep, I’ve passed my driving theory test. For anyone who’s outside the UK, the British driving test is made up of two parts, theory and practical, and you’ve got to pass the theory before you can even be considered for your practical. So, I’m halfway there…

I’m pleasantly surprised actually, because up until 12.30 last night I was out in Wolverhampton, and I don’t work well without a lot of sleep. Of course, it could have been worse; I might have had to have been designated sober person at my mate’s birthday night out. As it stood, even though I bought him a ‘Kiss Me It’s My Birthday’ badge, the pub was 90% men, and therefore I didn’t have to run interference with angry boyfriends, bouncers, escaped lunatics, etc.

And props to the taxi driver who got me home last night – I should have taken his name because he was quick, friendly and professional, which is always a good thing when you’re paying for someone to drive you somewhere late on a Friday night. He wasn’t quite as memorable as the taxi driver who took us to the airport in San Francisco last year though. He taught us that the best way to drive through the busy American traffic was to constantly flash your hazard warning lights and to deliberately use the opposite indicator in order to keep other road users on their toes. He was also very open about the fact that he had a woman AND a teenage mistress, and warned us to be careful in case we ended up pulling a hippo in a pub. I think he meant ‘hippo’ to mean an ugly woman, although I might be wrong about that. When you’re heading for a chicane at 70 miles an hour, you don’t ask for clarification…

We tipped him though, because if nothing else he was entertaining, in a crazy, edge of your seat, forty-eight points on your licence sort of way…

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